Daily Archives: January 9, 2014

Painting a Porch

Posted on January 9, 2014 by Ron

Wanting to earn some money, Cletus decided to hire himself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. He went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs. “Well, … Continue reading →

Posted in Humour | Tagged | Comments Off on Painting a Porch

All Out of Anaesthetic

Posted on January 9, 2014 by Ron

A dentist ran out of anaesthetic just before the last extraction for the day was scheduled. He gave the nurse a very large needle, instructing her to jab it hard into the patient’s butt when the signal was given, so … Continue reading →

Posted in Humour | Tagged | Comments Off on All Out of Anaesthetic

0 to 200 in 6 seconds

Posted on January 9, 2014 by Ron

Bob was in trouble as he’d forgot his wedding anniversary and his wife was extremely upset. She told him “Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in six seconds!” The … Continue reading →

Posted in Humour | Tagged | Comments Off on 0 to 200 in 6 seconds

Glad to be drunk

Posted on January 9, 2014 by Ron

A completely inebriated man was stumbling down the street with one foot on the curb and one foot in the gutter. A cop pulled up and said, “I’ve got to take you in, pal. You’re obviously drunk.” Our wasted friend … Continue reading →

Posted in Humour | Tagged | Comments Off on Glad to be drunk

Thoughts for the Day

Posted on January 9, 2014 by Ron

Today in History (January 9th): 1768: The first modern circus was staged in London. 1788: Connecticut became the fifth U.S. state. 1859: Birthdays: Women’s suffrage and peace movement leader Carrie Chapman Catt. 1861: Mississippi seceded from the Union. 1878: Birthdays: … Continue reading →

Posted in Quotes, Thoughts for the Day, Vocabulary | Tagged , | Comments Off on Thoughts for the Day