“Never trust a dog to watch your food.” – Patrick, age 10
“When your dad is mad and asks you, ‘Do I look stupid?’ Don’t answer.” – Hannah, age 9
“Never tell your Mom her diet’s not working.” – Michael, age 14
“Stay away from prunes.” – Randy, age 9
“Don’t pull Dad’s finger when he tells you to.” – Emily, age 10
“When your Mom is mad at your dad, don’t let her brush your hair.” – Taylia, age 11
“Never let your three-year old brother in the same room as your school assignment.” – Traci, age 14
“A puppy always has bad breath, even after eating a Tic-Tac.” – Andrew, age 9
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“You can’t hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.” – Amir, age 9
“Don’t wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.” – Kellie, age 11
“If you want a kitten, start out by asking for a horse.” – Naomi, age 15
“Felt-tip markers are not good to use as lipstick.” – Lauren, age 9
“Don’t pick on your sister when she’s holding a baseball bat.” – Joel, age 10
“When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your Mom when she’s on the phone.” – Alyesha, age 13
“Never try to baptize a cat.” – Eileen, age 8