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Daily Archives: December 30, 2014
Captcha
PRONUNCIATION: (KAP-chuh) http://wordsmith.org/words/captcha.mp3 MEANING: (noun), A test used to make sure that a human is using a system, not a computer program. The test typically involves reading distorted text. ETYMOLOGY: An acronym of Completely Automated Public Turing Test to tell … Continue reading
Choking
When the wealthy businessman choked on a fish bone at a restaurant, he was fortunate that a doctor was seated at a nearby table. Springing up, the doctor skillfully removed the bone and saved his life. As soon as the … Continue reading
Funny Signs
In a Pennsylvania cemetary: “Persons are prohibited from picking flowers from any but their own graves.” On a Tennessee highway: “Take notice: when this sign is under water, this road is impassable.” From the safety information card in America WestAirline … Continue reading
Classroom Smarts
Kids are smarter than they used to be. And they do say the dandiest things! Check out the following wisecracks and wisdom and you be the judge! TEACHER: Why are you late? WEBSTER: Because of the sign. TEACHER: What sign? … Continue reading
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Excited Father
The new father ran out of the delivery room and announced to the rest of his family who were waiting for the news: “We had twins!” The family was so excited they immediately asked, “Who do they look like?” levitra … Continue reading
Church Social
Our minister announced that admission to a church social event would be six dollars per person. “However, if you’re over 65,” he said, “the price will be only $5.50.” Tadagra Strong has been clinically viagra online in india shown to … Continue reading
Punch Lines
I earn $50,000 a year and spend $50,010. All my life it costs me $10 a year to work for nothing. Life is like a penis: When it’s soft, you can’t beat it, and when it’s hard, you get f*cked! … Continue reading
Three Questions
CLIENT: Can you tell me what your fees are? LAWYER: Well, I charge 100 pounds to answer three questions. Nothing is like that, you can say the problem pfizer viagra canada is uncommon but it exists. About 6,400,000 Prescription had … Continue reading
Holy Hole in One
There once was a priest who really LOVED to play golf. He awoke one Sunday morning to a beautiful sunny day and thought, “I’ve just got to play golf today!” He called over the assistant priest and told him he … Continue reading
Mr. Fix-It
Once upon a time there lived three men: a doctor, a chemist, and an engineer. For some reason all three offended the king and were sentenced to die on the same day. The day of the execution arrived, and the … Continue reading