Daily Archives: January 30, 2015

Today in History (January 30th)

There are 335 days left in the year. 1647 King Charles I handed over to English parliament. 1649 Deaths: Charles I King of Great Britain (1625-49), beheaded by order of Parliament for treason. 1798 The first fight to break out … Continue reading

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Quotes (January 30th)

“I shall live badly if I do not write, and I shall write badly if I do not live.” – Francoise Sagan, playwright and novelist (1935-2004) “Don’t walk behind me; I may not lead. Don’t walk in front of me; … Continue reading

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Trivia

Did you know ……… It is impossible to lick your elbow. A crocodile can’t stick it’s tongue out. A shrimp’s heart is in their head. People say “Bless you” when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for … Continue reading

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Just Plane Dumb

The Ecuadorian captain had grown increasingly anxious over rumors of an impending air strike from neighboring Peru. “Pedro,” he ordered his aide-de-camp, “I want you to climb that mountain and report any signs of Peruvian military activity.” “Si, Capitano,” replied … Continue reading

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Just Call Him ‘Flipper’

Max, a terrible student, reported for his final exam which consisted of yes/no answers. He took his seat in the hall, stared at the questions and took a quarter out of his pocket. He then started tossing the coin and … Continue reading

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Heaven Can Wait

Einstein dies and goes to heaven. At the Pearly Gates, Saint Peter tells him, “You look like Einstein, but you have NO idea the lengths that some people will go to to sneak into Heaven. Can you prove who you … Continue reading

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Ode To The Malty Brew

He was a wise man who invented beer. – Plato Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. – Benjamin Franklin If you ever reach total enlightenment while drinking beer, I bet it makes beer … Continue reading

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Getting A Divorce

Sam and Molly went for a divorce. The judge looked down at them. “How old are you?” he asked. “Ninety-six,” replied Sam, “and I’m in the pink, the pink!” “Ninety-two,” said Molly, “and I feel like sixty, judge!” “And you … Continue reading

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Old Couple Arrived in Heaven

An eighty-five-year-old couple, married for almost sixty years, died in a car crash. They had been in good health the last ten years, mainly as a result of her interest in health food and exercise. When they reached the Pearly … Continue reading

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Death Notice

When the husband finally died his wife put the usual death notice in the paper, but added that he died of gonorrhea. No sooner were the papers delivered when a good friend of the family phoned and complained bitterly, “You … Continue reading

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