A blonde with two burnt ears went to the doctor, who asked what had happened.
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“What about the other one?”
“They called back.”
I met a girl whose breasts were growing out of her back.
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“All right, wise guy,” said the principal. “What’s the name of your parents?”
“Mom and Dad.”
Stress is when you wake up screaming, and then you realize that you haven’t fallen asleep yet.