Did They Mean to Say That

On a New York loft building: “Wanted: Woman to sew buttons on the fourth floor.”

In a New Hampshire medical building: “Martin Diabetes Professional Ass.”

In the office of a loan company: “Ask about our plans for owning your home.”

In a New York medical building: “Mental health prevention center.”

In a toy department: “Five Santa Clauses — no waiting.”

On a New York convalescent home: “For the sick and tired of the Episcopal Church.”

On a Maine shop: “Our motto is to give our customers the lowest possible prices and workmanship.
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At a number of military bases: “Restraicted to unauthorized personnel.”

In a number of parking areas: “Violators will be enforced and Trespassers will be violated.”

On a display of “I Love You Only” Valentine cards: “Now available in multi-packs.”

In the window of a Kentucky appliance store: “Don’t kill your wife. Let our washing machines do the dirty work.”

In a funeral parlor: “Ask about our layaway plan.

On a window of a New Hampshire hamburger restaurant: “Yes, we are open. Sorry for the inconvenience.”

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