May the “force multiplier” be with you!
You can talk about your “intensifers,” “enhancers” and “amp ups,” but nothing boosts your linguistic output these days like the trendy buzzword “force multiplier.”
Force multipliers are products or programs that repay their initial costs many times over. Picture a male and female rabbit. Or a good education. Or the salty peanuts served free in bars to make customers thirsty.
Sometimes force multipliers help businesses to “pivot” — the latest jargon for shifting focus, changing policy or — dare I say it? — flip-flopping. Newspapers report, for instance, that the international economy is pivoting to Asia, that candidates are pivoting on immigration reform, and that Major League Baseball is pivoting to young stars.
I haven’t seen this much pivoting in baseball since Evers took the toss from Tinker, pivoted on second, and threw to Chance.
And have you noticed that politicians and pundits no longer discuss the public perception of a situation or event? They analyze its “optics.” Writes one reporter, “The optics of the Prime Minister’s desertion reflect unfavorably upon Assad’s brutal regime.”
Did the Prime Minister depart wearing eyeglasses as a disguise? After all, until the last few years, “optics” was associated primarily with telescopes, microscopes and optometrists. Come to think of it, would a company marketing for a new whole-grain cereal be worried about the “fiber optics”?
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Like many political buzzwords, “optics” tries to coat an ordinary concept with a high-tech, scientific veneer. And don’t get me started on two other icky “-ics”: “tectonics” and “metrics,” those highfalutin words for “fundamental shifts” and “numbers,” respectively.
Likewise, “concierge service” has escaped the confines of its luxury hotel and is now running amok, painting the town red, as in red. Apartment buildings, retail stores, corporations — even doctors and hospitals — now offer “concierge service” — premier, personal perks reserved for the wealthy. No waiting in lines!
And remember when “artisanal” referred to a product lovingly hand-crafted by a quaint, forelock-tugging carpenter, potter or baker? Now every mass-produced, plastic-encased food — from shredded cheese to frozen pizza to chocolate-chip cookies — is being marketed as “artisanal.”
Artisans of the world unite! You have nothing to lose but your chain stores!
Rob Kyff, a teacher and writer in West Hartford, Conn., invites your language sightings. Send your reports of misuse and abuse, as well as examples of good writing, via e-mail to Wordguy@aol.com or by regular mail to Rob Kyff, Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd Street, Hermosa Beach, CA 90254
Copyright 2013 Creators Syndicate Inc.